If you aren’t earning what you’d like to be earning, you may have a deserving or worthiness issue. Now before you argue with me, let me say that even if you have five educational degrees and see yourself as confident, you may still have a deserving and worthiness issue.
You’re wired with an inner set point indicating how worthy and deserving you are of money, reward, and pleasure. This set point acts like a preset thermostat to modulate how much you need to match your current level of “worthiness”.
How can you determine your worthy and deserving set point? Just look objectively at your life. Right now, you are at the exact level of how worthy and deserving you feel in:
- Your income and overall wealth
- Physical Health
- Loving and being loved
You’re always at your set point. Does anything on the list feel off-balance?
If you set a goal (for any of these), you’ll often feel worthiness issues come up because of this unconscious set point that determines the balance of your pain versus pleasure and struggle versus joy about much more than just money. Your set point includes:
- How hard you need to work for your money
- How much you should earn
- How much you should save
- How much relaxation you’re allowed
- How much reward, love, and joy you’re allowed
- How much pleasure you’re allowed
If you go beyond any of these, you’ll sabotage yourself. And that looks like this:
- You procrastinate
- You’re overwhelmed
- You can’t decide what to focus on first
- You’re anxious and worried
- You’re over-committed
Does this sound like you?
These unconscious actions work together to maintain your worthy and deserving set point. What often happens is that when you earn a good income, then you need to work lots of hours to make that happen especially if you grew up in a family where one of the rules was to “work hard for your money”.
And just as your unconscious actions sabotage, they can also support you! When you do the inner work to shift your set point up …
How valuable you believe your time and efforts to be determines how much of your time and energy needs to be given to feel deserving of other people’s money, love, appreciation, or validation.
So, if you don’t feel the value of you and your work, you must work long and hard to deserve any of those things.
And this is when your business and life aren’t fun anymore.
When you change how you value yourself and your work, you don’t need to prove yourself anymore. Stay tuned for my next Post where I show you how to determine your worthy and deserving set point and how to clear it.